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Hullabaloo


Sunday, January 11, 2004

 
We're Number 1!

Matt Yglesias says:

Speaking personally, I'm a walking stereotype of a rootless cosmopolitan liberal, and I've been to Vermont, and I can tell you that New York City is definitely where the freak show is at and it gets a whole lot freakier than a damn latte. Just wait 'till Elliot Spitzer's in the White House, then we'll show 'em...


Now, wait a minute. Is he actually saying that the real left wing freak show is in New York? I beg to differ. While it is undoubtedly true that New Yorkers are more likely to read The New York Times, in every other category we here in the land of fruits and nuts are definitely the true home of the left wing freak show.

We boast of more sushi per square foot in just the west side of Los Angeles than any other city on the planet, including Tokyo. They serve it as baby food in this town.

We don't just swill Lattes. We buy them at drive-thru Starbucks from behind the wheel of our Prius hybrid (suitably adorned with a Darwin fish and Save The Bay sticker.)

And you bet we love Hollywood. We ARE Hollywood and we really, really love ourselves. We love ourselves so much that per capita we spend more on on every form of bodily improvement including lifts, tucks, percings, tattoos, implants and extensions than all other states combined. When it comes to defilement of the human body, we are unequalled. Remember, we are not only the home of the squalid and depraved mainstream Entertainment business, we are the capitol of the multi-billion dollar pornography business, as well.

Eliot Spitzer? That's nothing!

In California even the Republicans are sushi-eating, latte swilling, body-building, Kennedy-marrying, nude-posing, armani-wearing, sexual-harrassing, card carrying members of the left wing freak show. We not only worship empty-headed celebrities, we elect them to the highest office in the state.

Seriously Matt, while Vermonters may wear big comfortable shoes and drive big Swedish cars and New Yorkers might read the paper and watch depressing Swedish movies, isn't it obvious that the real left wing freak show is indisputably here in Lalaland? Barbara Streisand lives here, for crying out loud.





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